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Why Americans Shouldn't be Allowed to Travel; XD
Topic Started: Jul 3 2007, 02:04 PM (416 Views)
GosoxJ
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Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel

The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:



I had someone ask for an aisle seats so that his or her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii.  After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown.  I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts. "Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Capecod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa."  Her response ... click.

A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state."

I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." He said "But they look so close on the map."

Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour lay over in Dallas.  When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I need a car to drive between the gates to save time."

A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 8:33am.  I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of llinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection?" After putting her on hold for a minute while I "looked into it" (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them."

A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."

A businessman called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."

A woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York" The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent: "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere." The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big animal!"


http://www.strangeplaces.net/weirdthings/travel.html
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Krushrpants
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Some of those are pretty good! ^_^
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<span style=Commie Mario</span>
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lol, so bad
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GosoxJ
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Krushrpants
Jul 3 2007, 03:10 PM
Some of those are pretty good! ^_^

Yeah, my favorite is the one about the guy who wanted to rent a car to drive around the air port.

I'll assume you edited it, so that it has the quote... I never thought of that... =/
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DARTH ANDY
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lol the last one is funny then the others XD XD
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drizztmainsword

Hehe, XD

Wow, makes you so proud to live in this country, doesn't it…
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mossad

Only we can be so blatantly ignorant of the world around us and still do fine.
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Dude2000
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mossad
Jul 3 2007, 04:57 PM
Only we can be so blatantly ignorant of the world around us and still do fine.

God Bless America. :lol:


I like the Florida being a very thin state one...that was good.



To be, or not to be: that is the question. To die, to sleep; no more; and by a sleep to say we end. To die, to sleep; To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there's the rub. For in that sleep of death what dreams may come when we have shuffled off this mortal coil must give us pause. That makes calamity of so long life, for who would bear the whips and scorns of time when he himself might his quietus make with a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear, to grunt and sweat under a weary life, but that the dread of something after death, the undiscover'd country from whose bourn no traveller returns, puzzles the will and makes us rather bear those ills we have than fly to others that we know not of? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all...
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DARTH ANDY
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Dude2000
Jul 3 2007, 07:23 PM
mossad
Jul 3 2007, 04:57 PM
Only we can be so blatantly ignorant of the world around us and still do fine.

God Bless America. :lol:


I like the Florida being a very thin state one...that was good.

dont diss florida! ilive there and its huge and takes hours to get across the state (which SUCKS)
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Jesusfreak13551

he wasn't talking bad about florida and compared to a lot of other states Florida is pretty small. How long does it take to get across what part of Florida?
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Dude2000
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DARTH ANDY
Jul 4 2007, 10:27 AM
Dude2000
Jul 3 2007, 07:23 PM
mossad
Jul 3 2007, 04:57 PM
Only we can be so blatantly ignorant of the world around us and still do fine.

God Bless America. :lol:


I like the Florida being a very thin state one...that was good.

dont diss florida! ilive there and its huge and takes hours to get across the state (which SUCKS)

Haha, Florida is full of old people!!!

Seriously though, it was referring to an earlier joke...



To be, or not to be: that is the question. To die, to sleep; no more; and by a sleep to say we end. To die, to sleep; To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there's the rub. For in that sleep of death what dreams may come when we have shuffled off this mortal coil must give us pause. That makes calamity of so long life, for who would bear the whips and scorns of time when he himself might his quietus make with a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear, to grunt and sweat under a weary life, but that the dread of something after death, the undiscover'd country from whose bourn no traveller returns, puzzles the will and makes us rather bear those ills we have than fly to others that we know not of? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all...
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Grand Admiral Bob
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I can't believe how stupid ppl can be. Its crazy O_o
"Can you see England from Cananda"!? What in the world! how stupid can you be?!
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Dude2000
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Grand Admiral Bob
Jul 4 2007, 07:57 PM
I can't believe how stupid ppl can be. Its crazy O_o
"Can you see England from Cananda"!? What in the world! how stupid can you be?!

When I was little, I thought I saw China from California!

I did see land, it was just some crappy island... >_>

Even still, I was like 9 at the time, hardly fully educated and grown like these people.



To be, or not to be: that is the question. To die, to sleep; no more; and by a sleep to say we end. To die, to sleep; To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there's the rub. For in that sleep of death what dreams may come when we have shuffled off this mortal coil must give us pause. That makes calamity of so long life, for who would bear the whips and scorns of time when he himself might his quietus make with a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear, to grunt and sweat under a weary life, but that the dread of something after death, the undiscover'd country from whose bourn no traveller returns, puzzles the will and makes us rather bear those ills we have than fly to others that we know not of? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all...
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Grand Admiral Bob
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lol, thats funny. And now that you mention it...I thought I saw Portugal when I was a little boy standing on a beach in New Jersey.
I guess its acceptable when you're a kid XD
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mossad

DARTH ANDY
Jul 4 2007, 11:27 AM
dont diss florida! ilive there and its huge and takes hours to get across the state (which SUCKS)

I'll talk slower from now on.
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