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tom the overly-exaggerated
Topic Started: 15th September 2006 - 10:08 AM (299 Views)
tiger kitten of doom
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holy disciple matrix squirrel on a mission to destroy all evil
well i decided to take a break from the serious stories and name my character tom!!

tom was born in a small clan in the land of lustria. this clan was called donkeypox and in donkeypox they were break offs from the main pestilens clan.they had been mentally disturbed by these potions and diseases and so have started donkeypox! now tom was a substantially brawny skaven but was also intelligent. but through the sorcery that would intrude in his clan when he was born he was diferent from the other skaven. he was a squirrel!!!*dum dum dum...* tom usually kept in the crowd but his tail did not. tom then new he was blessed of the holy gods and began training in the art of war. and though praying to the holy gods he could create powerful spells and blast away his enemies!!!!so tom was good for many things and later in his life he was respected by his peers.he wore a robe and a large hood and arround his left arm he had two blades strapped on by bandages. and so comes the tale of tom the overly exagerated.

comments appreciated.

-tom :D
Aye, fight and you may die, run, and you'll live... at least for a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!”

-william wallace, braveheart
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grey acolyte squeeky
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i like it. completely nuts! everyone knows squirrels are just rats with furry tails anyway.

its silly, off the wall monty python humour. i love it!
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lashific the Dominator
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kicking snow since IC 134
do i see a skaven squirrel thing comedy novel book thing coming up?
"Suffer not the witch to live"
Ordo Hereticus army diary
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tiger kitten of doom
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holy disciple matrix squirrel on a mission to destroy all evil
YEs its true :D ! im writing a script for my drama class right now! it pokes fun at: queer eye for the straight guy, frankenstien, batman, the pope,chare[the really old woman], steven kings it and gayness. he he. its gonna kick A$$ ! what else should i add and give some ideas......here i'll post it now.
actors=
tom=me, teacher loves my sattire humor.i'm 12 if that tells what not to put in. :D
patrick=funny :P
sajjad=okkkk..... :)
canmbell=learning difficulty, don't mean to be judge mental but.....sucks.... -_-
here ya go! we use wobble head puppets, [foam ball on stick with cloth on top , looks cute and cool]
Patrick:* talking while sajjad is singing* well it sure is a coincidence that all the popstars have been disappearing lately and this guy came in there place with all the best looks and skills.
Tom: oh well state the obvious why don’t you .
Patrick: can we get back to the story please….
Tom: Fine, but this guy seems to perfect , even for a rockstar. Lets follow him after.
*sajjad leaves stage*
Tom and Patrick scream as his head falls off then look at eachother then look back then hug then stop and look at eachother…
Tom: um yeah football
Patrick:sport
Tom:girls
Patrick:beer
Tom:motorbikes
Patrick:cricket,
Tom: Ga,….*looks at pat* Cricket?
Pat: yeah, its manly
Tom:snorts.
Sajjad:hey you over there, haven’t you ever seen a grown mans head fall off before.
Tom:no…… I don’t think I have
Patrick: well, it’s a first for me.
*sajjad bonks tom & pat on head*
*wake up*
Patrick:where, ….where are we….?
Tom:I don’t know but it looks tacky , this could do with a makeover from the guys from queer eye for the straight guy.
Patrick: nah, they disappeared
Tom: how long ago?
Patrick:what? Did you expect me to know, about gay guys, its not like I spend time on their website forum?
Tom: dude I checked your computer, I know what you did last summer…
Patrick:*worried grumble from high to low pitch* ohh, ok….2 weeks ago
Cambell :Gentlemen gentlemen. You are now captives of the great cambell vo carstien. *retarded evil laugh* yes, ahem well you have met my creation , no. well he has been sown together from pieces of other rockstars, and a clown.
Patrick: a clown?
Cambell: yes a clown , he was the only service I could afford after paying tax for this evil lair.
Tom:c,c,c clownsssss….
Cambell: whats wrong with him?
Patrick: well, tom has seen steven kings it. It has scared him for life.
Cambell:well enough about that, and back to the story……um oh yeah, he has been sown together from other rockstars, nice handywork eh, eh ?
Tom: oh please, if I wanted to see pieces sown together id go to a chare concert.
Patrick: I heard that!
Tom: damn straight!
Cambell: now, go over there . im going to take your parts away.
*straps tom & Patrick down[imaginaly]*
Patrick: Batman, Batman!
Tom: What,? You don’t call for {sarcasim=;] ;batman; , geez .
Patrick: then who?
Tom: the pope!
Pat: what?
important , i need it today, or tomorrow cause today for me is wed, night and i have to do it on friday but more ideas would be great for future projects and if you want i'll tell you what the teacher said!!! thanx-tom


not good, tomorrow is the day and i'll check back in an hour and a half. ANY ideas are wanted. i'll try for an ending but thanx for ideas if posted



Good news, yes i know this continual adding is wierd but yes . i got 10/10! :lol: and mister " you suck tom" and i know everything and am completely obnoxoius got 9/10 , which isn't that bad but he said " you suck at drama tom
" and who's beating you now harry! who's beating you now!!! ha ha ha ha
Aye, fight and you may die, run, and you'll live... at least for a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!”

-william wallace, braveheart
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tiger kitten of doom
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holy disciple matrix squirrel on a mission to destroy all evil
sry for th double post but i didn't want to have a quarter page filling post, so heres the next bit of the comedy called " tom the overly exaggerated"

now tom has broken off from donkepox and joined the break-off from clan moulder called "oo ee oo ah ah ting tang walla walla bing bang" this clan was named by the witch doctor who sadly died from a homicidal rat ogre attack......
now tom would control 2 ogres and a pack of rat ogres and be considered a master moulder if he signed a contract which he did and now tom own's a small[deplorable] force. one day tom was scouting around hell pit when suddenly an assassin came up behind him and tried to stab tom but he was a total noob at ninratsu and missed a stab while tom was only 2 feet away. then tom turned around and said to the assassin
"give me your stabby-death things"
and he said " why?"
and tom said " NE, NE , NE , NE"
and patheticly the assassin gave him the stabby death ninja claws.
Tom came across a rat wearing a brown robe and stabbed him with the blades and took his robe.
the rat, wide eyed who stood next to tom said " um, theres a stall for cloaks over there , you didn't have to kill him."
Tom took offence to this and killed that rat.

the next morning in the oo ee oo ah......something tribe tom led a scouting force out into the forest but they came upon a chaos scouting force , and as the scouting forces became aware of each other they formed a battle line. and as the attack force of skaven was about to attack a packmaster announced:
"uh tom...."
"what now"
"well mr.snickers has to pee"
"which ogre is that"
"it's the one that is grabbing it's crotch and leaping from side to side violently"
"fine, go behind that bush over there"
tom could here grunting and disturbed pushing noises coming from the bush. both the chaos and skaven were literally wide eyed at this sound and tried to ignore this sound but it was to loud. finally mr.snickers came back from the bush with his packmaster .

both battle lines charged and clashed as the rat ogres picked up some chaos wariors and knawed at thier heads, even though they don't have any teeth so they gummed them to death.......

the chaos lord challenged tom to a challenge inbetween the gore fest! and tom excepted.....
the chaos lord swept his big blade at tom but tom dodged and stbbed the chaos lord in his stomach only for his blades to scratch....
"dude , you scratched my armour, do you know how much that cost?"
"no"
"well, nothing really because 'pimp my armour' came around and did it for me ."
tom frantically scratched at the chaos lord's torso but nothing happened. finally the chaos lord smacked tom in the face sending him flying backwards. tom was recovering when he spotted the lords only weak spot. tom quickly charged him and with incrediblr speed dug his blades into.....................his crotch!!! the lord screamed in agonizing pain and called for hid minions to get some frozen peas but before they could do anything they were chopped up into tiny bits like gorgonsola cheese and tom took back his rat ogres and rats and capture the lord....... Tom thought of the ultimate punishment for a follower of khane....... he dug his head into the puddle of mr.snickers pee, the lords head rose up from the puddle screaming in pain as his head started to dissolve.

tom thought to himself for a moment there .....' yes acid pee, it's brilliant!!!'
so tom attapted his rat ogres to have over productive bladder with acid pee.......toms rat ogres were feared throughout the land and so comes the legend of tom and the acid pee ogres.


tell me something you wanna hear about [like pop culture , insults to celebs or stange and distubing bodily functions] and i'll try my best to fit it in somewhere....or possibly your character somewhere...



-tom :D
Aye, fight and you may die, run, and you'll live... at least for a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!”

-william wallace, braveheart
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tiger kitten of doom
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holy disciple matrix squirrel on a mission to destroy all evil
the next episode in tom's story

so far tom has left moulder while saying goodbye to lashific, and traveled around aimlessely......
with a pack of clan rats

"are we there yet?" questioned a clanrat
"no, we are not there yet james" mumbled tom
"how about now"
"yes!"
"really "
"no"

"where are we going now tom"
"well i don't bloody know but if you shut up for 10 seconds i might be able to read this map!!!!"
"fine...."
no wonder these guys were happily 'gifted' to me pondered tom
"hey,tom why are we travelling above ground if were trying to get to skavenblight"
"um", studdered tom "hey ,james , can you search behind that bush over there"
"ok but i don't see how this helps us get there faster"
"oh it will"tom said with please as he started to crawl towards the bush ...."BOOOO"
"Aghhhh" screamed james as he stumbled backwards roughly 5 metres and fell off the cliff face.
"problem solved' said tom as he joined the group

two days later the clanrats and tom had made it to skaven-blight

"i present to you ,.....the capital of the skaven cities!!
*skips to council of thirteen*

we aree theeeee......council of skaven blight!
we'll run away from every fight!
about the horned rat we preach and tell
when we die were goin straight to hell
our slaves are the first to die
to our lives they're just a small frie
*retarded voice* I LIKE PIE!!!!

"wow , that sucked" said tom"lets go, hopefully they'll stop singing"

and away they went into the eerie deps of skavenblight to search for the 'maker of magical things that help you when you need to kill enemy clans then turn them into slaves which bring you skavenade when u want it and give you footrubs and fluff your pilows and put those little umbrellas in your drinks shop'...........


-tom
Aye, fight and you may die, run, and you'll live... at least for a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!”

-william wallace, braveheart
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