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| ~Ever Island~ | |
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| Topic Started: May 17 2007, 02:24 AM (100 Views) | |
| Asuran B | May 17 2007, 02:24 AM Post #1 |
Avatar and siggy by Ongaku.
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[size=7]Prolouge[/size] THE sun beat down on the island as waves crashed upon the shore, shifting the sand in a pattern as if it were searching for something buried. Suddenly, it stopped. The water pulled back into the ocean before raising high above the beach. At the sound of moving water and the thirst of salt, large ears pricked up straining to hear what was making it. The small dog-like creature grinned and thought to himself, 'They came back.' When the water came down from its lofty position, Eevee's bloodlust kicked in. His black eyes turned red and his tail became like needles. It was too late, he had let the water come too near; his body was nearly crushed and he returned to his normal state. Before he was unconsious again, he wondered, 'Will I ever wake up?' And he didn't. [size=7]Chapter One[/size] DREAMS are wonderful things. They give us a break from the harsh truth. Some give us the opposite and mess up our whole day, Eevee wasa having this kind. At first it may have seemed like a paradise, what with the palm trees, perfect weather, and friendly Pokemon, but hidden deep within his mind, Eevee knew that something was wrong with this place. Slowly, he opened his eyes, then screamed in suprise when he saw staring back at him the face of a Nuzleaf. It keeled over in laughter and when it regained its composure it asked Eevee, "How did you get here?" "Well, I was on a ship and it crashed and then there was a storm and it carried me to the shore of an island and then the water started attacking me and I fought it but then it hurt me and I fell asleep and I am here but where is here?" Eevee ended with a large breath and fell down. "Woah, slow down. To answer your question, we are on Ever Island. You must be new," Nuzleaf responded. "Ever Island?" inquired Eevee. "Yes," Nuzleaf said darkly. Anyone who touches the island is transported here with psychic power and is then buried under the sand. You see, we are all in an artifical world. It is said to be created by a very powerful Slowking. All of us have been pulled away from the real world to live as pawns in his game." Eevee started to understand. "Does this mean I will never see Seth again?" |
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| Houndoomed | May 18 2007, 10:16 PM Post #2 |
Don't mess with the best.
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Wow, this was great. I love the way you describe everything so... detailing(ly)
 The Chapter is a bit short, it could be a bit longer. I don't see any mistakes (apart from wasa instead of was and inquired instead of enquired) Try making the 2nd Chapter and bit longer and keep up the good work! |
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| Inta_Xonem | May 19 2007, 08:22 AM Post #3 |
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Slowpoke is slooowwww
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I really like it. Is that the end of the chapter though?! |
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| Asuran B | May 19 2007, 12:59 PM Post #4 |
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Avatar and siggy by Ongaku.
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Hey, Nitro Typhoon, couls you PM me my chapter 2. I am pretty sure it is on Acanthite. Oh wait... They deleted everything about me. The chapters are going to get longer. Don't worry. |
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| Houndoomed | May 19 2007, 01:39 PM Post #5 |
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Don't mess with the best.
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K. And Chapter 2 isn't on Acanthite. |
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