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| The Region of Jinan Comments.. | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 25 2005, 08:50 PM (173 Views) | |
| Seth | May 25 2005, 08:50 PM Post #1 |
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Unregistered
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Please put your comments to my Mutation story "The Region of Jinan" here. Such as positive and negative points and any other opinions of it. |
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| Fure | May 25 2005, 08:59 PM Post #2 |
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Human Controversy
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Okay, as a critic here comes my review I say you should touch up dialouge a bit, but die down on the adjectives a bit, But other than that I like. |
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| Seth | May 25 2005, 10:17 PM Post #3 |
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Unregistered
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Thanks, I'll try and work on that. |
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| Shed | May 26 2005, 12:31 AM Post #4 |
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Don't go in the Shed!
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You should also work on concentrating better while you write... varipus punctuation errors and things like "What will I where today?" (instead of "what will I WEAR today?") got me quite confused... |
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| Seth | Jun 9 2005, 05:16 PM Post #5 |
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Unregistered
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Sorry about that, I just edited the first chapter up a bit and I just finished the second chapter. Tell me what you guys think of it. |
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