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The Region of Jinan Comments..
Topic Started: May 25 2005, 08:50 PM (173 Views)
Seth
Unregistered

Please put your comments to my Mutation story "The Region of Jinan" here.

Such as positive and negative points and any other opinions of it.
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Fure
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Human Controversy
Okay, as a critic here comes my review

I say you should touch up dialouge a bit, but die down on the adjectives a bit, But other than that I like.
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Seth
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Thanks, I'll try and work on that.
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Shed
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Don't go in the Shed!
You should also work on concentrating better while you write... varipus punctuation errors and things like "What will I where today?" (instead of "what will I WEAR today?") got me quite confused...
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Seth
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Sorry about that, I just edited the first chapter up a bit and I just finished the second chapter. Tell me what you guys think of it.
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