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    Most of the U.S. sucks.
    Topic Started: May 13 2006, 10:35 PM (817 Views)
    P=D
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    Birdo
    Today it rained all day which, of course, made me bored since we all know rainy days automatically make you bored and depressed. It's just the way things are. Seeing water fall from the sky is a depressing thing, it's a proven fact. Anyway, this got me thinking about how much being bored sucks. After a while this got me thinking about other things that suck. Some things that immediately sprung to mind were most of the people on this site, most people on NSider, and most people in general. This started to get lame after a while so I shifted my hate towards world geography.

    There are a ridiculous amount of countries out there that suck. I'm not talking about third world countries here. At least their situations are noticeable enough for the rest world to at least feel bad for them. When someone says "Ethiopia" at least you know that they're talking about a country mainly inhabited by starving children. On the bright side of things, Ethiopia is a relatively well known country, which is more than most countries can say.

    There many countries out there that you've never heard of. They've have never contributed anything significant to the world or done anything important enough for the rest of the world to even care about their existence. Take Mauritius for example. It just plain sucks. Be honest here, have you ever heard of this country before? Don't even try to lie because I already know that no one knows or cares about Mauritius. If you're one of the two or three people who live there and you're reading this right now, do us a favor and find a way to sink your country into the ocean. See if anyone cares about some random island that speaks the languages Urdu, Hakka, and Bojpoori. Trust me, they won't.

    Thinking about Mauritius for those 30 seconds (which is probably more than anyone from the U.S. has ever continually thought about Mauritius) really made me thankful that I live in the best country in the world. Granted, we do have a few parts of our country that suck, but that doesn't change the fact that we're awesome... or so I thought. There a few embarrassing states like Alaska, which has more grizzly bears than people, but hey, that's the only state that sucks, right? I used to think so too, but then I looked a map. There are tons of states that suck so much that they're forgettable. Extremely forgettable, actually. After I remembered that Alaska was part of the country, I started brainstorming other states that suck and, much to my dismay, coming up with them was very easy with the aid of a map.

    You see, when you think of the U.S., the good states usually come to mind. No one cares about the sucky ones so they're easily forgotten about. This leads to the misconception that most of the U.S. doesn't suck, which is not the case at all. It's quite the opposite, actually. As a reference material, I've successfully separated all the states into two categories, since my opinion is law. If all the states I've listed under "states that suck" seceded from the union today, no one would care, except for the people who live there, but they suck so it doesn't matter. Sorry, but if you're from one of the states that I've listed in the suck category then you most likely suck as well. Don't even try to argue because you're obviously biased towards your (sucky) state. If you'd like me to elaborate on my rationale for putting a certain state into the suck category, then feel free to ask... Unless you're from Wyoming, in which case you don't even deserve that much.

    States that suck (35):

    Alabama
    Alaska
    Arkansas
    Connecticut
    Delaware
    Georgia
    Idaho
    Indiana
    Iowa
    Kansas
    Kentucky
    Louisiana
    Maine
    Minnesota
    Mississippi
    Missouri
    Montana
    Nebraska
    Nevada
    New Hampshire
    New Mexico
    North Dakota
    Ohio
    Oklahoma
    Oregon
    Rhode Island
    South Carolina
    South Dakota
    Tennessee
    Utah
    Vermont
    Washington
    West Virginia
    Wisconsin
    Wyoming

    States that don't suck (15):

    Arizona
    California
    Colorado
    Florida
    Hawaii
    Illinois
    Maryland
    Massachusetts
    Michigan
    New Jersey
    New York
    North Carolina
    Pennsylvania
    Texas
    Virginia

    In conclusion, the U.S. is still awesome, but isn't as awesome as most people think. Fortunately, the states that don't suck are badass enough to make to the U.S. still be collectively awesome. The states that suck just dilute that awesomeness slightly.

    Oh, and if you don't live in the U.S., then you probably suck. (Rule of thumb: Your area doesn't suck if it's important enough to have a professional sports team somewhere close by.) If you foreigners ever come to the U.S., make sure to avoid the states that suck at all costs (feel free to use this as a tourist guide). And if you're from Canada, the farther you are from the U.S. border, the more you suck. Northern Canadians, you should still count your blessings because it could be worse; you could live in Mauritius.

    Edit: LET'S ALL THANK MATT FOR POINTING OUT A MINOR GRAMMATICAL ERROR THAT NO ONE CARES ABOUT.
    Elusive
     
    You don't want to piss off P=D. Trust me.

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    Delirium
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    Patriots=Dynasty
    May 13 2006, 10:35 PM
    States that suck (35):
    Wisconsin

    For the truth. It rained all day and I got to watch the computer screen as well as listen to my girlfriend rant about such boring topics.
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    Desertmonkeymanaz
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    Soon to be Tetris DS owner
    Yay, my state is in the 'non sucky' category.
    Posted Image

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    Jake34
    winner
    I agree, Missouri does suck, but so does Illinois.
    I'm Awesome.
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    VJ
    vj wtf
    Quote:
     
    Oh, and if you don't live in the U.S., then you probably suck. (Rule of thumb: Your area doesn't suck if it's important enough to have a professional sports team somewhere close by.) If you foreigners ever come to the U.S., make sure to avoid the states that suck at all costs (feel free to use this as a tourist guide). And if you're from Canada, the farther you are from the U.S. border, the more you suck. Northern Canadians, you should still count your blessings because it could be worse; you could live in Maritius.


    Now, i live in Britain, but i live near a pro footy team, English Footy that is. Do i suck?
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    Whacka
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    Wiitastic! Wiitabulous! Wii...great!
    I guess I'm really sucky then?
    Wow thanks P=D that's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me :P

    BTW you suck too!
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    I wonder where these bosses come from? Are they just confined to one room? What do they eat?
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    CrackJäck
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    When in Rome...
    VJ
    May 14 2006, 03:11 AM
    Quote:
     
    Oh, and if you don't live in the U.S., then you probably suck. (Rule of thumb: Your area doesn't suck if it's important enough to have a professional sports team somewhere close by.) If you foreigners ever come to the U.S., make sure to avoid the states that suck at all costs (feel free to use this as a tourist guide). And if you're from Canada, the farther you are from the U.S. border, the more you suck. Northern Canadians, you should still count your blessings because it could be worse; you could live in Maritius.


    Now, i live in Britain, but i live near a pro footy team, English Footy that is. Do i suck?

    I live in the UK too.
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    loz
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    \''/
    Unless you live near Portsmouth FC in which case you suck anyway. There was this guy who came from the UK, he cycled around the world - arrived back in Portsmouth and quickly had his bike stolen.
    ...

    Yeah pretty sigs and all that
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    P=D
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    Birdo
    Jake34
    May 14 2006, 12:59 AM
    I agree, Missouri does suck, but so does Illinois.

    For the most part, Illinois does suck, but it does have one important city which is enough to save it from the suck category. Plus the first three letters of its name is sometimes written "lll" which is just cool.

    VJ
     
    Now, i live in Britain, but i live near a pro footy team, English Footy that is. Do i suck?

    Probably not, but there's no guarantee.
    Elusive
     
    You don't want to piss off P=D. Trust me.

    Shieldbou
     
    ...if you think for an instant that I am going to back down and let you monopolise the forum, then you are wrong.
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    Chopstix
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    butts (◡‿◡✿)

    "Texas"

    It only sucks durring the summer.

    That when you could fry an egg on the sidewalk.

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    Come and join Smash Camp, it's almost open!

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    Shadow Boo
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    ...

    Aww. I suck.
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    Kirby12
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    The Kirby Kid
    Yay. I don't suck.
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    VJ
    vj wtf
    Shadow Boo
    May 14 2006, 07:32 PM
    Aww. I suck.

    Damn Straight you do. :P
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    CrackJäck
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    When in Rome...
    VJ
    May 14 2006, 01:59 PM
    Shadow Boo
    May 14 2006, 07:32 PM
    Aww. I suck.

    Damn Straight you do. :P

    Damn straight you do
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    *_*
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    I come, I go.
    Well my state sucks apparently. Well, I knew that.
    http://my.opera.com/N+
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