Welcome to Europeia!
So what the heck is Europeia anyways? Europeia is a region of NationStates that follows the principles of republicanism, meaning the officials of Europeia are elected by the people, of the people, and usually for the people.
Can I join? Of course. Of course. All you have to do is register an account. Validate said account (it should send an email to the email address you have provided, if it did not pester us about it here). Your account in the beginning will automatically be placed in the non-citizen usergroup. You can change that by applying for citizenship. The application, for security purposes, usually takes a few days to be processed by our forum administrators. But once that is done you can see it all and do it all as a full citizen of Europeia  .
So, I came here representing another region? I do not want to become a citizen. Where should I go? First you have to register an account. Then you have to validate said account (it should send an email to the email address you have provided, if it did not pester us about it here). Your account in the beginning will automatically be placed in the Non-Citizen Usergroup. Then you can apply for diplomatic masking.
What offices are there for people to be elected into? Well, first of all there are three Branches of Government. There is the Executive, the Legislature, and the Judiciary. The Executive is responsible for the day-to-day governance, the Legislative writes and manages the laws of Europeia, and the Judiciary has the Power to review laws to see if they comply with our Constitution as well as hear trials against accused citizens. The Executive is made up of the President, the Vice President and their Cabinet. The President and the Vice President are elected together every 70 days. They then nominate other citizens to fill the Cabinet Posts. Those nominated are then confirmed by the Senate. For more on the Executive click here. The Legislative is made up of the Senate and the Citizens' Assembly. The Senate is made up of a minimum of five citizens who are elected into office every 70 days, exactly 35 after the presidential elections. The Senate writes or repeals laws, confirms Ministers and Judges and can remove any elected official. The Citizens' Assembly writes pre-Legislation, which is then passed on to the Senate for approval. Members of the Assembly are not elected. Instead every citizen is automatically a Member. For more on the Legislature click here. The Judiciary is made up of the High Court, which answers legal questions and hears criminal and civil cases, looking to the laws of the Republic, both statutory and common, to render judgment. It is made up of the Chief Justice and three Associate Justices. The Justices serve for a 120-day term. Instead of being elected, they are nominated by the President and then confirmed by the Senate. For more on the Judiciary click here.
What is there for me to do in Europeia? If the game of high politics is not your cup of tea you can always just hang around doing fun things. Or if you want to put some work in, there is always the Civil Service, the Navy, and the Citizens' Assembly. As citizen, you can join the Civil Service (or CSO). The CSO assigns its Members (called Assistant Ministers or AMs) to the different Ministries to help out the Ministers. As AM you can do many things and garner great accolades. Most of the great politicians of Europeia started in the CSO. Once you become a citizen, you can also sign up to become a Sailor in our Navy, going out on raids, defending Europeia, or helping our allies defend themselves. Or, if reading and creating Law is more your speed, you can always join the Citizens' Assembly. If all of that did not sound like enough fun we have Spam Games, reasoned and less reasoned debate, Newspapers, Roleplays, and so much more.
That answers most of my immediate questions. What if I have any more? You could always check the Newcomer's Handbook to see if the answer to your question is there. It may even be in the FAQ (or Frequently Asked Questions). If neither answer your question, you can ask our admins here.
|
|
Party Can't Figure Out What To Do Besides Party; E-Mensa
|
|
Topic Started: Dec 11 2015, 06:41 PM (124 Views)
|
|
Sloosh
|
Dec 11 2015, 06:41 PM
Post #1
|
Self-Aware Silly Putty
- Posts:
- 318
- Group:
- Non-Citizen
- Member
- #5,011
- Joined:
- November 17, 2015
|
 E-Mensa - "Party Can't Figure Out What To Do Besides Party" Written by Sloosh
They say the midlife crisis is inescapable, and no matter how much we like to deny it, this proves true time and time again. No matter how respectable you are, sometime during your forties you're gonna buy a corvette, pick up some Viagra, and try to convince yourself that you're still appealing to twentysomething coeds.
Well, Europeia's foremost political party has done just that.
It started out innocently enough. They decided they wanted to rebrand - for the sake of the analogy, this is the corvette. Not because they weren't appealing to newcomers (conventionally attractive coeds, for the sake of our example); absolutely not! It was just, uh, because they didn't want to be confused with the External Affairs Advisory Committee anymore. That's it. Mhmm.
"I... entirely disagree with... keeping the current name," the party's self-appointed Charlie Crist Impersonator and resident Florida Man said in a post in the ACE Headquarters. The above quote has obviously been abridged for clarity, but the point here is clear: the old fart in question doesn't think the party has kept up with the times.
Tragically, it only went downhill from there. "I think the party needs to have a serious existential discussion about the type of group it wants to be," a many-limbed stalwart said. "But, why do we need to be meaningful as a party? That's the existential question," he continued, waving his tentacles around nervously. "If we're doing this just to be a party, that's a lame reason to do it."
Alright, well, that makes sense. For the sake of our analogy, this is the point where you look back and realize that the button-pushing office job you've spent the past twenty years in is painfully dull and hasn't given any meaning to your tiny, pitiful life.
"We're doing it to advance certain ideals," another member said vaguely, in an attempt to be comforting.
This is where you start booking trips to China and buy tickets to go hang-gliding in Montana in a desperate attempt to feel like you're doing something with your life before you wither away and die tucked away in some nursing home, lonely and unloved.
"What ideals?" a party member asked quizzically, pausing for a moment to swallow a mouthful of baked potato before continuing. "What ideals do we have that the region doesn't have?" The hysteria mounted as more citizens chimed in.
"But ... what ideals?"
"I've yet to really hear any ideals..."
"We definitely decided to be more than a social club."
"Yes, but how?"
"Integration of newcomers!"
"Mentoring of younger players?"
"Assimilate [the] newcomers."
Here is where, in our analogy, you head to a college bar and start hitting on women half your age in an attempt to prove that you're just as attractive and virile as ever which, let's face it: you aren't. Even after buying drinks for a couple cute coeds and getting nothing but disgusted and creeped-out looks in return, you still aren't deterred! You just need to remake your image.
Get that new hairstyle that's only seen on eighteen-year-olds working in Hot Topic.
"Discreetly" purchase some Viagra.
Start trying to use modern slang.
Get up-to-date on those "memes" - pronounced "maymays", of course.
Maybe even think up some ridiculously complicated endorsement selection system to make newcomers more comfortable!
I know - how about you PM the chairperson with your opinion and a secret code! Then, they'll post your idea with this super-secret sequence of numbers (something innocent, like 666-69-666) so you know it's yours!
Now, I know what you're saying: "That's a brilliant idea, Sloosh! You're so smart and attractive. Personally PMing the head of the party with your possibly unpopular opinion is gonna make new people way more comfortable than a blind and completely anonymous poll. Just like college women are obviously way more likely to be interested that weird old guy trying to pull off skinny jeans and Vans than one who takes his maturity in stride and isn't really, really obviously trying too hard."
I know, I know. I'm glad you can see just how amazing my plan is. Props for fitting it in with my analogy, too!
This reporter promises to keep you up-to-date on this new phase of the Loaded Baked Potato Party's life. Until this blows over, I'd recommend staying out of all the Aeropostale, Hot Topic, and Abercrombie & Fitch stores in the Republic Square. I don't know about you, but I sure don't want to run into an existentially-challenged political party in the changing room.
Author's note: this article contains a number of quotes from protected areas managed by The Action Coalition of Europeia. Following is proof of Chairman Aexnidaral Seymour Somerset's authorization of the declassification of these documents:
Authorization
Edited by Sloosh, Dec 11 2015, 06:47 PM.
|

Quotes - Ninja Kittens
-
RULE #1.) NO HITTING ON SLOOSH
- Ninja Kittens
-
Poor Sloosh. Born to party, body can't take it.
- Calvin Coolidge
-
Of all the slooshes in the world, you're my favorite.
- Aexnidaral
-
awww you have such a cute gayboy voice
- Aexnidaral
-
sloosh is the twinkiest cutie
- EuroChat
-
[10:00:32 PM] Mouse <3~: sloosh for president! [10:03:43 PM] Theo: Slooshtatorship incoming.
Things I Do  E-Mensa Editor, Faux News Reporter
|
| |
|
Aexnidaral Seymour
|
Dec 11 2015, 06:44 PM
Post #2
|
Somebody's got to keep you entertained.
- Posts:
- 6,280
- Group:
- Citizen
- Member
- #4,791
- Joined:
- August 12, 2015
|
- Quote:
-
the party's self-appointed Charlie Crist Impersonator and resident Florida Man
That's hilarious.
|



Family, Resume, and Awards Family  The Right Honourable Aexnidaral "Crist" Seymour Somerset

Son of North East Somerset and Rachel Husband of Pichtonia Seymour Somerset, Phantasus Chastain, and Ogastein Father of Isaris, Klatonia, XIV, and America Billiards Brother of JGlenn, Apollo, Brunhilde, and Ninja KittensResume and Awards "... Aex, who is treated like the Europeian version of Nickelback by a lot of people here."
|
| |
|
Rand
|
Dec 22 2015, 04:09 PM
Post #3
|
Some of them call me...
- Posts:
- 3,542
- Group:
- Citizen
- Member
- #2,642
- Joined:
- August 18, 2012
|
Sloosh? You're coming with me... for, ah... disclosing confidential party materials... a violation of... the law.
Edited by Rand, Dec 22 2015, 04:09 PM.
|
The Rt. Hon. Rand "Otis" Chastain, ESS EED Former Speaker of the Senate
C.V. 2018 Attorney General (President B----e/Rach, 11/7/2017 - 1/13/2018) 2017 Attorney General (President Cat/Writinglegend, 8/29/17 - 11/6/2017) Associate Justice (04/15/17 - 08/25/17, by President Calvin Coolidge) Minister of Culture (President Writinglegend, 06/25/17 - 08/25/17) Director of the Civil Service Office (Interior, Leo Drakan, 2/24/17 - 04/12/17) Speaker of the Senate (58th Senate, 01/14/17 - 03/04/17) Senator (58th Senate, 12/24/16 - 03/04/17) 2016 Senator (55th Senate By-Election, 7/19/16; 56th Senate, 8/6/16; 57th Senate, 10/16/16) Deputy Speaker of the Senate (Speaker A----a, 57th Senate, Oct. '16 - Dec '16) Minister of the Interior (President Writinglegend, 9/13/16 - 11/19/16) Minister without Portfolio (President HEM, 8/16/16 - 9/10/16) Deputy Speaker of the Senate (Speaker Isaris, 55th Senate) Director of the Civil Service Administration (VP HEM, 07/10/16 - 8/16/16) Europeian Republic Navy, Active Duty Mate (Grand Admiral WritingLegend, 02/09/16) 2015 Senior Deputy Minister of the Interior (Minister Aexnidaral, 02/15/16 - Resigned 3/19/16) Deputy WA Delegate for Communications (Delegate Mousebumples, 12/23/15 - Resigned 3/19/16) Elections Editor for the E-News Network (HEM, 12/21/15 - ?) Deputy Minister of the Interior in charge of Recruitment (Minister Malashaan, 12/06/15 - 02/13/16) Minister of the Interior (Pres. Writinglegend, 9/30/15 - 12/05/15) Deputy Chairman of the Citizens' Assembly (Chair Kuramia, 8/7/15 - 9/22/15) Chairman of the Europeian Imperialist Party Region Inc Chairman of the Board (mixed President / Speaker) Director of Human Resources (mixed Minister of Finance / Chief Justice) R&D Scientist (Forum Admin) Director of Public Relations (Minister of Foreign Affairs) Donate Stamps! Supported the continued growth of the Republic!

Ever noticed those little guys at the bottom of the website? Miscellaneous... Quotes - Drecq
-
We can also create a new pronoun that we define as singular and gender neutral. Thing is we slip slightly into orwellian newspeak territory there.
- shufordbrian
-
[12/30/15 22:59:57] Otis: shuf would you still like me if I were a woman [12/30/15 23:00:10] Shuford: hell yes
- Trinnien
-
[21:05:54] Trinnien Augustan: I heard Calvin was considering, which is why i stopped that bullshit by naming him as my running mate
- HEM
-
- Mousebumples
-
You still haven't answered my question.
- Common-Sense Politics
-
Rand receives one CSP cool point. The rest of you have no cool points.
- Quote:
-
Does anyone other than the Speaker and Rand have anything to say about this important issue?
- Writinglegend
-
101 WAYS TO BUMP UP FORUM ACTIVITY: EO SOMETHING
- Common-Sense Politics
-
Stupid people. They're so...stupid.
- Writinglegend
-
Rand - Today at 7:01 PM ok now I'm confirmed
Writinglegend - Today at 7:03 PM cabinet iq just dropped twenty five points
Artwork Verse - Psalm 30:5
-
For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.

|
| |
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
|