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Breaking News!; my attempt at satire.
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Topic Started: Oct 12 2011, 04:21 PM (169 Views)
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PASD
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Oct 12 2011, 04:21 PM
Post #1
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Consol Energy
- Posts:
- 8,640
- Group:
- Citizen
- Member
- #716
- Joined:
- June 15, 2009
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Breaking News:
Defenders Finally Stop All Raiding
We have breaking news into the newsroom right now. Nationstates is down. The website is not loading. Some are calling this a travesty, others calling it a victory for the defender world. Nationstates went down about noon, Eastern Standard Time, earlier today, and has been down since. Our sources have told us that the Founderless Region Alliance have called this a victory for them. Is it a coincidence that the game went down almost around the noon update? This news reporter thinks not. Frattastan, the Arch Chancellor, of the FRA has called for a continuous absence of the Nationstates website, also stating that is better for us than them.
An anonymous defender stated, we, defenders, know that this world is better without those imperialistic scums floating around going around pillaging innocent regions, while we just sit and spam our own forums and play with ourselves. He also went on to say that the longer Nationstates is down the better it is for the defender world, because we can blame it all on them, and take all the credit for it.
This news station has not yet received any updates for the raider side of the game. More updates to come….
Update: NS is back up, and the defenders are done playing with themselves and are trying to move on with their lives but having trouble doing it.
This article is used purely for satire. Do not take seriously. And if you have to read this article for more than four hours, please see a doctor.
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Former President of Europeia
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Anumia
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Oct 13 2011, 01:55 AM
Post #2
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Anumia Novo Spiritus
- Posts:
- 29,038
- Group:
- Banned
- Member
- #31
- Joined:
- April 15, 2007
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*giggle*
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Signature The One. The Allfather.-- "He stood with his head held high, critics screaming, and did what he truly felt was best for Europeia." - Common-Sense Politics He's the only person in NationStates who can successfully combine outrageous pomposity with a real support for democracy. - Indycar Racing Do I really need to talk about Anumia? The guy can write like Shakespeare, think like Socrates, and I learned on EuroChat yesterday that he can sing too. I bet he's hung like a bull moose. - Common-Sense Politics Anumia, you have a great mind. - Lethen Someone like Anumia only comes around once in a while. - Kabanatuanistan To be perfectly honest, I'm just going to trust Anumia and approve - Falconias I saw your amendment and wondered whether I had died and gone to heaven. It's beautiful. - Swakistek This is why we should all listen to Anumia. Clearly he is a god amongst men. - Fortana | You are not all knowing. You are not all powerful. You are not Anumia. - Griff I have the greatest respect for Anumia - don't let this thread fool you - but I wish he'd stop winning. - Hyanygo Actually, Hy, the things I wanted to say were: Go Anumia! I love Anumia! - Lethen Anumia with whatever power I have I hereby declare you the winner of everything, forever. - Fortana Long live the Emperor! All Hail Anumia, King of Kings! - Peaceful Llamas How about we realize democracy here is flawed and we make Anumia our dictator? - karthikking I agree with you, Anumia, as all Europeians should. - Swakistek To be honest I'm just going to vote whatever way Anumia votes. - Fortana |
Awards I fought in the Osiris Campaign.
  Amusing Quotes - Quote:
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Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:36 AM): I need you Sai'on'ay the Light Elf (Shower) says (7:37 AM): For? Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:37 AM): an Anumia vs Anumia debate  Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:38 AM): Were doing a 4 part debating series with Europeia and Rougiers brought up doing a "Anumia vs Anumia" debate I want you to be our Anumia
- Klatonia,Jul 5 2011
- 04:03 AM
Drop dead, Dre.
- Lethen
- Aug 15 2013, 03:00 AM
You think I fact-check the shit I say? 
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Crist Seymour
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Oct 13 2011, 01:57 AM
Post #3
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Generally retired and broken; or something of the sort.
- Posts:
- 3,905
- Group:
- Voluntarily Banned
- Member
- #1,116
- Joined:
- March 30, 2010
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- Anumia
- Oct 12 2011, 09:55 PM
*giggle*
Oh shit, Anumia is giggling.
EVERYONE, TO THE BUNKERS!
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[hide=Awards] [/hide]
 Son of North East Somerset and Rachel Anumia, Brother of Apollo and JGlenn, Husband of Ogastein
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Rach
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Oct 13 2011, 01:58 AM
Post #4
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At Least 5% Sugar
- Posts:
- 16,841
- Group:
- Associate Justice
- Member
- #678
- Joined:
- May 23, 2009
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:lol:
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♥ Love and Kindness are never wasted ♥ The 2011 President of the Year Queen of Balder Unofficial Navy Girl
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Anumia
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Oct 13 2011, 02:11 AM
Post #5
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Anumia Novo Spiritus
- Posts:
- 29,038
- Group:
- Banned
- Member
- #31
- Joined:
- April 15, 2007
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- Crist Seymour
- Oct 13 2011, 11:57 AM
- Anumia
- Oct 12 2011, 09:55 PM
*giggle*
Oh shit, Anumia is giggling. EVERYONE, TO THE BUNKERS!
I just woke up! My giggle shields are down!
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Signature The One. The Allfather.-- "He stood with his head held high, critics screaming, and did what he truly felt was best for Europeia." - Common-Sense Politics He's the only person in NationStates who can successfully combine outrageous pomposity with a real support for democracy. - Indycar Racing Do I really need to talk about Anumia? The guy can write like Shakespeare, think like Socrates, and I learned on EuroChat yesterday that he can sing too. I bet he's hung like a bull moose. - Common-Sense Politics Anumia, you have a great mind. - Lethen Someone like Anumia only comes around once in a while. - Kabanatuanistan To be perfectly honest, I'm just going to trust Anumia and approve - Falconias I saw your amendment and wondered whether I had died and gone to heaven. It's beautiful. - Swakistek This is why we should all listen to Anumia. Clearly he is a god amongst men. - Fortana | You are not all knowing. You are not all powerful. You are not Anumia. - Griff I have the greatest respect for Anumia - don't let this thread fool you - but I wish he'd stop winning. - Hyanygo Actually, Hy, the things I wanted to say were: Go Anumia! I love Anumia! - Lethen Anumia with whatever power I have I hereby declare you the winner of everything, forever. - Fortana Long live the Emperor! All Hail Anumia, King of Kings! - Peaceful Llamas How about we realize democracy here is flawed and we make Anumia our dictator? - karthikking I agree with you, Anumia, as all Europeians should. - Swakistek To be honest I'm just going to vote whatever way Anumia votes. - Fortana |
Awards I fought in the Osiris Campaign.
  Amusing Quotes - Quote:
-
Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:36 AM): I need you Sai'on'ay the Light Elf (Shower) says (7:37 AM): For? Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:37 AM): an Anumia vs Anumia debate  Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:38 AM): Were doing a 4 part debating series with Europeia and Rougiers brought up doing a "Anumia vs Anumia" debate I want you to be our Anumia
- Klatonia,Jul 5 2011
- 04:03 AM
Drop dead, Dre.
- Lethen
- Aug 15 2013, 03:00 AM
You think I fact-check the shit I say? 
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Common-Sense Politics
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Oct 14 2011, 07:12 AM
Post #6
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Incapable of Bullshit
- Posts:
- 16,716
- Group:
- Honored Citizen
- Member
- #878
- Joined:
- September 28, 2009
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Men don't giggle.
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The Venerable Imperator Common-Sense Politics, ER ESE EBS EOB EC ES OR1-4 Father to McEntire
Chancellory Decorations
Presidential Decorations
Resume Former President x4 Former Vice President x3 Former Grand Admiral x14 Former Minister of Foreign Affairs x6 Former Chief of Staff Former Minister of Communications Former Minister of Foreign Cultivation Former Minister without Portfolio Former Attorney General x2 Former Deputy Minister of Welfare Former Senate Speaker x2 Former Senator x11 Former Associate Justice x2
References "CSP is the most influential President, in my opinion. There's something about him. It may be his way with words. It may be his unwavering vision. It may be the gravitas he holds. Whatever it is, the leadership he demonstrates is consistently excellent, bold, and pragmatic" - Writinglegend, longest serving Europeian president
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Avakael
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Oct 14 2011, 07:20 AM
Post #7
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- 76.278.4.193 -
- Posts:
- 756
- Group:
- Persona non grata
- Member
- #609
- Joined:
- April 5, 2009
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Site comes back up, 00000AWP, CoJ and GRA are suddenly all Unknown protectorates. Whats this nonsense about raiding ending?
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Anumia
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Oct 14 2011, 08:38 AM
Post #8
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Anumia Novo Spiritus
- Posts:
- 29,038
- Group:
- Banned
- Member
- #31
- Joined:
- April 15, 2007
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- Common-Sense Politics
- Oct 14 2011, 05:12 PM
Men don't giggle.
The mightiest of men have no need for concern about their masculinity and can thus giggle as they wish.
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Signature The One. The Allfather.-- "He stood with his head held high, critics screaming, and did what he truly felt was best for Europeia." - Common-Sense Politics He's the only person in NationStates who can successfully combine outrageous pomposity with a real support for democracy. - Indycar Racing Do I really need to talk about Anumia? The guy can write like Shakespeare, think like Socrates, and I learned on EuroChat yesterday that he can sing too. I bet he's hung like a bull moose. - Common-Sense Politics Anumia, you have a great mind. - Lethen Someone like Anumia only comes around once in a while. - Kabanatuanistan To be perfectly honest, I'm just going to trust Anumia and approve - Falconias I saw your amendment and wondered whether I had died and gone to heaven. It's beautiful. - Swakistek This is why we should all listen to Anumia. Clearly he is a god amongst men. - Fortana | You are not all knowing. You are not all powerful. You are not Anumia. - Griff I have the greatest respect for Anumia - don't let this thread fool you - but I wish he'd stop winning. - Hyanygo Actually, Hy, the things I wanted to say were: Go Anumia! I love Anumia! - Lethen Anumia with whatever power I have I hereby declare you the winner of everything, forever. - Fortana Long live the Emperor! All Hail Anumia, King of Kings! - Peaceful Llamas How about we realize democracy here is flawed and we make Anumia our dictator? - karthikking I agree with you, Anumia, as all Europeians should. - Swakistek To be honest I'm just going to vote whatever way Anumia votes. - Fortana |
Awards I fought in the Osiris Campaign.
  Amusing Quotes - Quote:
-
Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:36 AM): I need you Sai'on'ay the Light Elf (Shower) says (7:37 AM): For? Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:37 AM): an Anumia vs Anumia debate  Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:38 AM): Were doing a 4 part debating series with Europeia and Rougiers brought up doing a "Anumia vs Anumia" debate I want you to be our Anumia
- Klatonia,Jul 5 2011
- 04:03 AM
Drop dead, Dre.
- Lethen
- Aug 15 2013, 03:00 AM
You think I fact-check the shit I say? 
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Rach
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Oct 14 2011, 12:53 PM
Post #9
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At Least 5% Sugar
- Posts:
- 16,841
- Group:
- Associate Justice
- Member
- #678
- Joined:
- May 23, 2009
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- Anumia
- Oct 14 2011, 03:38 AM
- Common-Sense Politics
- Oct 14 2011, 05:12 PM
Men don't giggle.
The mightiest of men have no need for concern about their masculinity and can thus giggle as they wish.
You're a statue -_-
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♥ Love and Kindness are never wasted ♥ The 2011 President of the Year Queen of Balder Unofficial Navy Girl
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Crist Seymour
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Oct 14 2011, 01:06 PM
Post #10
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Generally retired and broken; or something of the sort.
- Posts:
- 3,905
- Group:
- Voluntarily Banned
- Member
- #1,116
- Joined:
- March 30, 2010
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- Rachel Anumia
- Oct 14 2011, 08:53 AM
- Anumia
- Oct 14 2011, 03:38 AM
- Common-Sense Politics
- Oct 14 2011, 05:12 PM
Men don't giggle.
The mightiest of men have no need for concern about their masculinity and can thus giggle as they wish.
You're a statue -_-
Of the manliest men of all the men. Anumia has balls of marble.
Legit.
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[hide=Awards] [/hide]
 Son of North East Somerset and Rachel Anumia, Brother of Apollo and JGlenn, Husband of Ogastein
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Anumia
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Oct 14 2011, 02:08 PM
Post #11
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Anumia Novo Spiritus
- Posts:
- 29,038
- Group:
- Banned
- Member
- #31
- Joined:
- April 15, 2007
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- Crist Seymour
- Oct 14 2011, 11:06 PM
- Rachel Anumia
- Oct 14 2011, 08:53 AM
- Anumia
- Oct 14 2011, 03:38 AM
- Common-Sense Politics
- Oct 14 2011, 05:12 PM
Men don't giggle.
The mightiest of men have no need for concern about their masculinity and can thus giggle as they wish.
You're a statue -_-
Of the manliest men of all the men. Anumia has balls of marble. Legit.
Both madiebee and I can confirm that we each definitely laughed at that. She laughed twice.
3 points for Seymour.
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Signature The One. The Allfather.-- "He stood with his head held high, critics screaming, and did what he truly felt was best for Europeia." - Common-Sense Politics He's the only person in NationStates who can successfully combine outrageous pomposity with a real support for democracy. - Indycar Racing Do I really need to talk about Anumia? The guy can write like Shakespeare, think like Socrates, and I learned on EuroChat yesterday that he can sing too. I bet he's hung like a bull moose. - Common-Sense Politics Anumia, you have a great mind. - Lethen Someone like Anumia only comes around once in a while. - Kabanatuanistan To be perfectly honest, I'm just going to trust Anumia and approve - Falconias I saw your amendment and wondered whether I had died and gone to heaven. It's beautiful. - Swakistek This is why we should all listen to Anumia. Clearly he is a god amongst men. - Fortana | You are not all knowing. You are not all powerful. You are not Anumia. - Griff I have the greatest respect for Anumia - don't let this thread fool you - but I wish he'd stop winning. - Hyanygo Actually, Hy, the things I wanted to say were: Go Anumia! I love Anumia! - Lethen Anumia with whatever power I have I hereby declare you the winner of everything, forever. - Fortana Long live the Emperor! All Hail Anumia, King of Kings! - Peaceful Llamas How about we realize democracy here is flawed and we make Anumia our dictator? - karthikking I agree with you, Anumia, as all Europeians should. - Swakistek To be honest I'm just going to vote whatever way Anumia votes. - Fortana |
Awards I fought in the Osiris Campaign.
  Amusing Quotes - Quote:
-
Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:36 AM): I need you Sai'on'ay the Light Elf (Shower) says (7:37 AM): For? Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:37 AM): an Anumia vs Anumia debate  Olde Delaware: AE, The Devil's Game, SPC, NS says (7:38 AM): Were doing a 4 part debating series with Europeia and Rougiers brought up doing a "Anumia vs Anumia" debate I want you to be our Anumia
- Klatonia,Jul 5 2011
- 04:03 AM
Drop dead, Dre.
- Lethen
- Aug 15 2013, 03:00 AM
You think I fact-check the shit I say? 
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