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Street Shark's Guide to the Genesis Gauntlet; Me and a Tape. Press Record and go!
Topic Started: Jan 24 2010, 02:46 AM (78 Views)
StreetShark
Large and In Charge
Well 2010 hasn’t exactly been a fun year so far! Playing nurse to my little brother then getting my arse kicked in my first big match of the year! We’ll call it a false start. Now it’s time to put things right. Time to get Street Shark back up to where he belongs! It’s time to decorate my waist with a lovely golden strap. January 26th, Sunny California, Genesis. The scene of my greatest ever victory. I’ll finally realise my potential in this company. The next CWF Paramount Champion! Things like this are never simple, though! I have 5 other people to get through to reach my destiny, Some I may consider a threat, some I most certainly do not. I’ve sat here for 3 days and nights in this darkened room studying everything about these people, and I’m recording this to make sure I know exactly what I’m getting in to. These notes will help me with preparation and will guarantee I walk away from Genesis with that belt securely round my waist. So let’s get started, who’s the first unlucky contestant on the “Get smashed by Shark” show? It’s the one, the only, Colton Mace!

Who the bloody hell is Colton Mace? What makes him think he has what it takes to be Paramount Champion? He wins a very poor match against The Blue Scorpion last week and begins to think he’s championship material! Nuh uh! Championship reigns are for people who deserve them. If anyone deserves to be a champion, it’s me! Not some young pretender like Colton Mace. His time will come a few years down the line, when he has earned the respect of his peers. Until that time, he can continue to take part in squash matches against part timers and have the occasional flirt with the big time. He’ll turn up on Tuesday, he’ll get crushed, and it’s a relegation back to the small time! It’s a shame, but that’s the way things go! He might be Paramount Champion in 2018, but this is my time! He will realise this!

And behind door number two in our trip through the roster… Mr. Re!

This is a strange one. Mr. Re’s name is strangely significant to his participation in this match! It is a complete mystery as to why he’s been given this opportunity! An opportunity he hasn’t earned! We were tag partners in that silly Ripper’s Rules match. It happened, we failed, we move on. What has happened in his fledgling CWF career so far? He gets destroyed by Jarvis King at the last Massacre. Now we can have a look at the matches he has won so far. Two matches he has succeeded in winning against two of the biggest stars in the business! Oh wait, my mistake, two of the biggest misfits in the business! Chris Xtreme and Kemsey Ramsey. Even still, they were matches he could have very easily lost. He’s in the same boat as Mr. Mace. He doesn’t deserve to be a champion, but his time will come. He will realise what a true champion is made of when I’m the last man standing on Tuesday. When the Street Shark stands on the top turnbuckle, with the paramount title above my head, these young pretenders will take note!

So who do we have as Number Three in Shark’s guide to an ass kicking? Oh looky here! It’s my old friend, Abigail Starr! Everyone’s favourite stoner bitch from hell! Abi’s been through the wars recently! Not only was she having sex with Rish, which is sickening in itself, but she got pregnant with the spawn of satan, got ran over by a lunatic, lost the spawn of satan and also lost her place in the Enterprise when we lost that match with the cyndicate. It is also worth noting that since coming back from injury, she hasn’t won a single match. I’m afraid to say that her poor record is going to continue. She’s going to be well out of her depth on Tuesday. She’ll be up for the match, and she’ll try her best to ensure a victory, but it just isn’t going to happen. I’m afraid to say she may never get back to the dizzy heights she once reached. Back in the glory days when she was CWF’s Impact Champion. A lot has happened since then and things have drastically changed. Whereas people like Mace and Mr. Re have their best days in front of them, I think Abigail’s best days are well and truly behind her. If it wasn’t for Victor Quinn’s psychopathic actions, she might still be a force to be reckoned with. It’s a shame, really. But shit happens. Life is a bitch, and then you bloody well die!

Now we move into the business end of the guide to the other five! And we continue with a look into the life and times of Mr. Chris Xtreme! The man, the myth, the leg end. Chris has become a veteran in CWF since it was reborn. He has had many matches and only recorded about two worthwhile victories. He is another former Impact Champion and has been Number One Contender for the Paramount Championship in recent times! He had to win battle royals to gain his title and contendership. I do think he is in the same boat as Abigail. He has had his moment in the sun and his glory days are long gone. It could be said that he is like me, in the twilight of his career and looking to roll back the years with a big title victory at Genesis. However, I’m sorry to tell you Chris that it won’t be happening. You’ve had plenty of chances you didn’t really deserve and you have squandered most of them. This will be no different. You’ll get your chance and you’ll miss out on the big prize. It’s a pattern you’ve gotten yourself into and it’ll be very difficult for you to get out of it! I’ll see you on Tuesday, Chris! You will see the meaning of destruction when there are five bodies lying on the deck at my feet as I stand as the new CWF Paramount Champion! Chris, you’re only there to make up numbers, pal!

Well, we have nearly come to the end of our journey through the contenders for the Paramount Championship. We have only one man left to discuss and it is the man with all the pressure on his shoulders. The CWF Paramount Champion, Mr. Dan Highlander! When he came to CWF, he got off to a bit of a slow start. He lost his first two singles matches to Vincent Vail, who has since faded into oblivion. He formed a tag team with King Nothing, and they did well together, losing in the final of the Tag Team Title Tournament to Andrelica. After that, his singles career took off, and he secured some big wins against some major players. He even defeated me in a one-on-one match! He’s held the title for just over two months, and in my opinion, that’s two months too long! It’s about time he was brought right back down to earth and I’m the man to do it. He’ll realise where he is in the CWF food chain after I take the Paramount Title from him! Then he can go back to taking part in exhibition matches against the likes of Bill Brasky. He calls himself The Hammer. I think he’s going to need something a lot bigger and heavier than a hammer to put me down any time soon! He knows that the real Street Shark will be there on Tuesday and I will be there to win. God help anyone who stands in my way.

Well now, that brings us very close to the end of the Guide to the Genesis Gauntlet. We have only one more competitor to discuss and it is none other than your next CWF Paramount Champion. Me! I’ve had my ups and downs since coming back to CWF and it will all come to a head on Tuesday. All my trials and tribulations, culminating in a match for the Paramount Title. It’s new ground for me, I’ve never succeeded in a Gauntlet match, but I have never felt this confident! These five pretenders have absolutely no idea what to expect from me on Tuesday. I’m going in with all guns blazing and I will not rest until that Paramount Title Belt is either in my bag or around my waist. I am making this promise to myself, and anyone who may listen to this, I will leave California as Paramount Champion. Mark my words.

Well, ladies and gentlemen! That brings this Guide to the Genesis Gauntlet to an end! I think we all know where I stand. And on Tuesday night, I’ll be standing with the strap on my shoulder as the newly crowned Paramount Champion. And do you know what? I can’t wait for it! It has been ten years in the making and now, finally, I have the best chance I’ve ever had to get me some gold.

Bring it on, I say!
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Street Shark: One third of the famous Scottish Bastard Trio.

Former CWF Paramount Champion

The Gargantuan Glaswegian
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