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Topic Started: Mar 9 2018, 01:13 AM (25 Views)
TheLostBoys

Struggled a bit this week with my rp but thought some parts of it came together nicely and tried to take previous comments into account.

Let me know what people think
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ChristianSTARR
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For what it was I enjoyed your RP. I feel like you could've dove into the character development section a little more head on. You left the readers with a big cliff hanger last week as far as both characters family histories and I would've liked to seen it touched on a little more if I'm being honest. I'm hoping your just saving it for a big match to give the payoff on, but a little more insight to it woulda been a nice touch. I do enjoy the back and forth between Sam and Dean though, I like the drunken party antics of one and the down to Earth attitude of the other. It's a good dynamic that I hope I can match with Starr and Payne a little better.

As far as the promo goes, I liked it. I like the confidence of the new tag team champions and the promo work against Danger Boiz was good, only complaint about it be that I feel you could've dived a little more into the Danger Boiz.


Also watch your spelling, I noticed a few mistakes while I was reading. I know how easy it can be to miss some when your excited to post but the extra time to spell check is worth it.

I loved what was there, but I'm left wanting more. It's not a bad thing, I'm a fan of the Lost Boys. Love your work. Hope we can chalk this week up to a bit of writers block and get onto the next one full force.
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THE FORMER PARAMOUNT CHAMPION
Break-Out Superstar - Confliction Block 2018
Champion of the Block - Unhinged Block 2018
Superstar of the Block [Tied] - Unhinged Block 2018


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Freddie Styles
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I think you also had a bit of comedown after the ppv, but that's to be expected, especially after claiming the gold. THis is a good time to refocus your story, while still being the fun loving Aussies. Your post was solid as always, but you can tell there wasn't that "oomph" like there has been. It happens to all of us...
Death is on the tip of her tongue and danger's at the tip of her fingers

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It's better to be a first-rate version of yourself than a second-rate version of somebody else
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The Weaver of Dreams
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Ever since they started out, I've been a huge fan of the Lost Boys. You have been so great in telling their story, while backfilling their history and make it all immediately relatable and with just enough humour to be thoroughly entertaining.

This one is just the perfect continuation of their story arc with the happenings in Australia still reverberating, especially in Sam and it is these details that make your rps so great to read. There is no pretentiousness in them, but they are just regular everyday guys with their problems and you bounce them off each other to be able to evolve and develop both at the same time, giving thim very distinct characters that make them immediately recognizable and when reading them, you can go "Oh, that's so Sam", for example, which is something really hard to achieve in a purely written environment.

I liked the little detail of the picture for the start of the match talk, because it gives you the visual of where they are. The talk itself is on the point, a bit different than usual, more geared towards an assassination, but it works well, especially since they now can talk from a champions' standpoint.

Really enjoyed it :)
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